Friday, June 12, 2009

... and then

At first I thought that scarfing down a sinful lemon cupcake would be enough to fill my never ending hunger, but sadly I later found myself in the drive-through line at a local Taco Bell ordering enough food to feed a family of five. For our family of two. My belly was rumbling, so as soon as I parked the car I demanded sustenance, which my dear husband took his sweet time on. After much complaining in what was probably three seconds, I received my first crunchy warm taco supreme. Greedily I took a bite and swallowed without really chewing.....

......

......... and ended up with a chunk of taco lodged in my throat. Yes, lodged in my throat. I coughed, drank some soda, swallowed a bunch of times to confirm that there was a taco wedge lodged in my throat. I blinked at my husband, who just continued to search through the bag of food looking for his soft taco supreme (wuss) as though there was nothing wrong. Did he not realize that his wife had a taco wedge lodged in her throat? Sure, maybe I could pass it through, maybe. OR in some stroke of weird, CSI like plot twist I might not swallow it through. Instead it'll sever my trachea* and I'll bleed out internally! My story will be the #355 way to die on 1001 Ways to Die, Death by Taco. Or Death by greedy fat cheeks.

I stared at my husband who kept asking "Where's my taco?" and informed him totally coolly that I had a taco wedge lodged in my throat. His response?

"You can talk, if you can do that you're not dieing." there was an internal dumbass comment in there I'm sure "Drink more soda".

I lived to see the next day, and the sore throat as a result of getting something pointy lodged in my throat. Ouch. Dumbass.

*yea I haven't taken biology in years and haven't taken an Anatomy class yet.. so this likely won't happen.

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